The next day came, I prayed to the God my mother serves that morning in tears because I did not have the nerve to refer to him as my God at that moment knowing what I’m up to. I also prayed for my mother. I called her full name in my prayer.
“Abigail Oluwabunmi Isaac, o ni foju sukun omo, Ina omo oni jo e loruko Jesu”
(Abigail Oluwabunmi Isaac, you will not weep over your child and You won’t loose any of your children)
I felt that prayer needed to be said in my language.
We set out with no hospital in mind. We saw a hospital and decided to try it. We are about to enter the gate and something stopped me. I tried to take another step but its like there’s a force pulling me back. Right there I knew it was a sign.
“Tunde! I’m not setting my foot inside this hospital, let’s check out another one”
He looked at me and he was like what’s going on.
“What’s wrong with this one nau, let’s go in first and make enquiries”
“No, I said firmly. My spirit is against this hospital”
We continued our search and came across another hospital and we decided to give it a try.
We entered into the hospital, I walked up to one of the Nurses at the reception and told her I wanted to see a doctor.
She brought out a form for me to fill. I filled it and gave it back to her.
She told me to go back to the reception to sit that the doctor will call me in.
I joined Tunde at the reception, some minutes later, I was called.
I entered the doctor’s office with Tunde. We exchanged greetings. He asked me some questions including why I wanted the abortion and I gave my answers.
He discovered I was a student and She asked for my School ID card which I showed him.
He told me I’m going to take another pregnancy test which I did. He directed me to the hospitals laboratory.
Deep down within me, I was hoping the result will come out negative, that is the only thing that can put a stop to this nightmare, but unfortunately the result came out positive.
An hour later, we were back in his office with the result.
He checked the result and documented it, he also wrote down somethings on the case note.
“Are you responsible for the pregnancy?” he asked facing Tunde.
“Yes sir” he answered.
“Did you agree to the evacuation?”The doctor asked
“Yes sir, it was our decision” he replied
The doctor brought out a form and gave it to him”
“You have to feel this consent form, which will serve as an evidence that you agree to the whole process”
“I just told you I did”
The doctor smiled. “You know we have heard of some cases of guys who sued hospitals for aborting there babies without their consent. So you see there must be a proper documentation”
Tunde nodded and filled the consent form. The doctor gave us the bill and told us to go and pay to the cashier. The fee was quite expensive. It’s a big hospital, so I already envisaged this.
“This is too much” he said as soon as we step out of the doctor’s office”
“Seriously! So you would have preferred we go to a quack ehn? See I won’t let you ruin my life, if anything happens in the future, you will look for an alternative” I said giving him a scornful look. To be sincere I’m beginning to hate him.
“Wait! Where is that coming from?”
I ignored him, I went to the cashier and paid. I already withdraw enough money from the ATM machine that morning.
After the payment, I was told to sit in the waiting room beside the OR( operating room)
I was there alone. I called my cousin and told her my plight just in case anything happen to me. I told her the name of the hospital and all she needed to know.
The doctor called me into the OR, I saw the instruments on the table and ran out.
“ I can’t do this” I cried
He asked one of the nurses to call my boyfriend. He came and encouraged me but I was scared. The doctors decided to give me anesthesia to put me to sleep.
Hours later, I woke up. I saw my boyfriend, doctor and two of the nurses staring at me. They were all sweating profusely despite the fact that the air condition is on. I look at Tunde’s eyes, they were red, its like he has been crying.
What’s going on here?.
“We haven’t done the procedure yet” the doctor said
“Why? I remembered you put me to sleep”
“You reacted to the anesthesia we gave you. We were able to resuscitate you after two good hours”
I now remembered everything I saw when I was asleep, it was all like a dream. I saw myself waving at my Parents, siblings and I was begging my boyfriend to go and tell my parents what happened to me. Meaning I almost die indeed.
I silently thank God for sparing my life.
At the end of the day, the abortion has to be done without any anesthesia. It was so painful, I screamed, I cried.
My boyfriend was there all through, he held my hand tried to calm me down. To be candid I gave everyone in the O R a tough time. Some minutes later, the doctor was through.
He left while the Nurses handle the rest. One of the Nurses was so nice to me, while the other one gave him a scornful look, I get the message she was passing across.
I know in her mind she would have given me many names like slut, love peddler, fornicator and murderer I guess. She’s free to judge me, she can call be anything but I’m very sure she’s not better than me.
The kind Nurse advice me to be very careful next time.
She told me guys are not really worth all this pains they put us through, she said they are like birds and they can fly away anytime.
She also said if my boyfriend insist on not using protection then I should zip up. She gave me all the advice she would give her own younger sister, she even gave me her number to call if anything comes up although she prayed there won’t be complications. I thanked her whole heartedly.
I was made to relax for some time before leaving. I was giving antibiotics and some analgesics. I joined Tunde at the reception and we left the hospital.
We got back to my boyfriend’s place, he prepared food and hot beverage, I couldn’t eat but I took the hot beverage. My cousin called and I told her I was back from the hospital. She wanted to come over but I told her it’s not necessary that I’ll be fine.
An hour later, the show began. I started bleeding. The bleeding was so much that I used 2 packs of sanitary pad in less than two hours. We were both scared to death.
I remembered the kind nurse gave me her phone number. I called her and she told me it’s normal for now, she told me the kind of pad to use not the regular ones and she also told to get some drugs. I called the names out while Tunde jotted it down. She told me to keep her posted.
Tunde rush down to a nearby stores and bought lots of sanitary pads and the drugs.
I couldn’t eat and I’m getting weak, He forced me to take the energy drinks he bought for me. I took it and vomitted on the floor.
I saw all the stressed Tunde went through and I had no choice than to pity him. He washed all my soiled clothes, stained bed spreads, he washed the toilets and made sure the room was cleaned.
“Well done” I said to him when he was through with the washing”
“Thank you. And I’m sorry for putting you through all this” he said with all sincerity.
I was indoor for a whole week bleeding the first three days was terrible, I thought would not make it.
The good thing is that our faculty had a one week exhibition and they declared the week lecture free. So I didn’t get to miss lectures that week. After 10 days the flow stooped. I saw hell, it was an awful experience.
My boyfriend stood by me all through and the hatred I had for him vanished slowly. I shouldn’t punish him for our mistake.
After the flow stopped and I was strong enough. I packed my things and left Tunde’s place, no more cohabitation. He did not even bother to convince me to stay. He knew my mind was made up.
I got back to my place, he actually followed me and help me clean up my room. He makes sure I was OK before he left.
That night, I wanted to pray but I couldn’t, I felt God will slap me if I dare to call him. I couldn’t even open my mouth to ask God for forgiveness.
Something kept disturbing my peace. My conscience was telling me “You know if you die now or rapture happens, you know you are going straight to hell”
After some days I found the courage to pray, I prayed for forgiveness but I couldn’t forgive myself. I killed an harmless child, that baby suppose to be my first child, but I denied it the right to live.
I live with the guilt everyday. I refuse to go to church, thinking God will strike me down if I dare to enter his house. I gave them some excuses in church.
I was in my room alone one Sunday morning, since I’m still scared of going to church I only listened to messages on radio.
The message talk about forgiveness. I cried after I had the message.
From that message I realized that God had already forgiven me all I need to do is to forgive myself.
The message really helped me moved on with my life. I started attending church afterwards and I felt normal again.
“We cannot embrace God’s forgiveness if we are so busy clinging to past wounds” – T.D Jakes
The following week, Joy came from her own school to check on me. I already told her on phone that I’m fine, but she still insisted in seeing me with her own eyes. She was happy to see move back into my room. She’s never liked the idea of cohabitation.
I resumed lectures, all my class mate accused us for not coming for the exhibition. We lied that we traveled. Everything was back to normal again.
For months I was on my own, I mean I never allowed Tunde touch me. I told him to give me time because I realized I feared sex more than anything else. and he respected my opinion. He said he’ll wait till i come around
A year later, we are actually in our final year. We heard a shocking news. The news is on tv, radio, every where. A particular hospital was raided by the police, report got to them that the owner of the hospital is fetish.
He uses pregnant women for rituals. Especially those that came for abortion, He uses both the fetus and mother for rituals. Many girls has been reported to die on his operating table. The news has already spread across the whole city.
Tunde and I were shocked, this is the same hospital I almost entered to have an abortion.
“No wonder you said your spirit did not agree with that hospital” Tunde said still in shock.
“I would have been a victim too” I said
I did not know where the tears came from, I cried. So God answered my prayer that day, I know He did not do it for me but He did it for my mother. The prayer I prayed for my mother who has served Him diligently with her whole heart was answered.
“This is nothing but pure grace, indeed our grace differs” I said to myself.
That very minute I made a promise that I will serve him all the rest of my life.
Everything went well between us, My love for him waxed stronger.
We both graduated with a first class. Tunde was the second best overall student.
Months later, Went for service. We served in different states but things was going on smoothly between us.
Yes, we have everything all planned out, we are getting married once we are through with service.
TO BE CONTINUE